


Sunny

by Oort



Category: Free!
Genre: First Kiss, Fluff, M/M, Panic Attacks, this is a prequel to this other idea I had so I'll probably be writing that
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-29
Updated: 2014-09-29
Packaged: 2018-02-19 05:28:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 864
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2376488
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Oort/pseuds/Oort
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Makoto and Haru in Tokyo: a beginning.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sunny

It was warm the day Haru moved to Tokyo; warm and gorgeously sunny, and the landlady waved at Makoto and told him that spring was coming.  She was younger than Makoto had expected, full-cheeked and pretty. It would do Haru good to talk to her.

The apartment had only one window, and no curtains at all, but it lit up a patch in the middle of the floor that made the small room seem cozy.  Haru had stood there a moment in brightness, his bag in his hand and his head tipped back, before Makoto had called him to help carry up the mattress.  Now he was curled up in the center of the light, eyes closed but not sleeping, a water-glass resting by his elbow.  It was empty, unlike Makoto’s; Makoto swirled what was left of his in the bottom of his glass, held it up to his eye to look at Haru through it.

“I hope you’ll like it here, Haru-chan.”

The blur that was Haru shifted; Makoto moved his glass away to see Haru blink open one eye, and then the other, and unfold himself into a sitting position. The sunlight washed over the cuffs of Makoto’s jeans, made frayed edges into bristles of gold.  Haru was half-lidded and beautiful, and Makoto smiled.

“You’re not really falling asleep, are you?  It’s the middle of the day! You haven’t done anything yet.” Makoto shook his head and reached forward to collect Haru’s glass from the floor.  “I’ll take these into the kitchen and then we should go out for lunch, you hardly have anything in your fridge and there’s this place just around the corner from my dorm—“

“Makoto,” Haru said, and kissed him.

His lips were dry, and they pressed hard against Makoto’s in a way that wasn’t entirely comfortable. Makoto froze, gaping, and then he heard the roaring in his ears and the air was gone from his lungs and _no, not now, this can’t be happening now._

The back of his shoulders hit something hard; he’d scrambled back into the couch, and now there was nowhere to go.  It was five counts in and eight counts out, and seven held in the middle, but that wasn’t working, and his head was so _loud_ —

There was a pressure on his chest, Makoto realized, different from the one that was closing up his throat. He clutched at it, found a wrist and five splayed fingers—and yes, there was Haru, his palm flat over Makoto’s ribcage, looking calm and controlled into Makoto’s eyes just like that first time, all those years ago, with the failed geography test and the greasy floor of the boys’ bathroom.

Haru stayed there through all of it, the panic thick and sour and his whole body shaking.  When Makoto found he could finally take a deep breath in and let it out without choking, Haru tipped his head back onto the couch cushions and brushed away the tears, his fingers soft and steady. It made Makoto feel small again, safe. He leaned into Haru’s hand. 

“I’m sorry,” he said.  Haru glared at him, like he always did when Makoto apologized for things he shouldn’t; the expression was so familiar that Makoto had to laugh. “Thank you,” he tried again. “I guess I shouldn’t have left my medication at home today, huh?” 

Haru’s fingers tightened on Makoto’s face, and for a moment—just a moment!— he looked angry.  “I won’t,” he said. His voice was rough.  He cleared his throat and continued.  “I didn’t know that it would upset you.”

“No,” said Makoto, and it surprised him how quickly the word left his mouth, even before Haru had finished speaking.  He could feel his neck growing hot.  “I wasn’t expecting it, so I…it’s silly, isn’t it?  You don’t have to stop.” And he was blushing harder, ducking his head down and away.  His heart seemed to be working a lot harder than it usually did. 

“Oh,” said Haru, and reached out again.  Makoto’s breath caught and Haru paused, but Makoto nodded at him with all the confidence he didn’t have and Haru tilted his chin and leaned forward.

It was softer this time, and that made it better.  Makoto wasn’t sure what he was supposed to be doing, but he tried to press his mouth back against Haru’s and maybe that was all right.  It was Haru that pulled back this time, his lips coming away with a wet little _smack._ He traced them with the tip of his tongue, pondering. 

Then: “Makoto. You’re staring.”

“…Hah? Really? I, I didn’t mean to, I…”

Was that a smile? Was Haru smiling? Was he— he was very close.

_Ah._

_Okay._

_Wow._

Makoto didn’t think his eyes could get any wider if he tried.   

“You don’t have to stop,” Haru mumbled. His hand went up to fiddle at the collar of his shirt.  The silence was only awkward because Makoto could hear how hard he was breathing.

He had to say something.

“Um.  Lunch? The place I was talking about?  Before?” 

“Mm,” said Haru.  _Assent._  He stood, offering a hand to Makoto. 

Makoto took it.

He didn’t let go.


End file.
